Pins and Needles

Dash had two bouts of pins and needles in a short one hour this late afternoon. Hmmm. Dash thinks that there could be at least two reasons for these attacks:

(A) Age is catching up. Now, the last time Dash checked, the warranty had expired. Ah well. Which divine being or department can Dash go to for an extension of warranty?; OR

(B) Someone (or maybe some people) is/are venting his/her/their frustration on a Dash-lookalike voodoo doll. For all the emails that added (or multiplied) onto their workload, especially in the past two weeks. Hmm. If so, Dash can only plead for leniency on grounds that Dash is only a messenger. Please don't poke pins and needles in me! Me, just a little page!; OR

(C) There is a martial arts pugilist in office who has successfully acquired the skill of immobilization across a distance (akin to 一阳指 perhaps?). And somehow unwittingly Dash must have just landed on his/her top 10 favorite list. Aiyah. Hmm. Have mercy!!

Dash P(l)in(g!) *falls and tumbles after one leg is immobilised